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Your Trauma Response is Normal - But it Doesn’t Have to Stay

fear focus pleasure power trauma Jul 27, 2020


Why would my trauma be coming up now?

Our world is in crisis + our bodies can tell.

It’s normal. And, it doesn’t have to stay your normal.

When you have trauma in your background, you spend a lot of time focused on harm.

What went wrong. What felt hard. What is missing. What we will not tolerate. What we are fighting against. What our bodies are rebelling against. What we don’t want.

But there’s another side.

What we DO want. What would feel good. What we desire. What would bring us pleasure.

It’s the missing piece in our conversation about healing, trauma and the next wave of women rising. 

What Are You Afraid Of?

What are you most afraid of finding as you uncover your true self?

What version of you are you most afraid someone else will see? What if THAT version of you could be loved?

For a lot of women, trauma surfaces once they are safe and loved in a new relationship. Suddenly they don’t want to be touched AT ALL, or hide behind exhaustion or making themselves busy, because intimacy right now would be so vulnerable.

Same thing around years of avoiding sex, or pleasure, or exploring. ⁠

They realize it’s not a switch that can just be flipped. From total shut down to open, playful, easy freedom.


But it’s teachable, and trustable, letting ourselves remember what feels good, safe, and true. So that we can connect on every level with our partners, our selves, our inner voice. And it might take some unlearning. If you’re anything like most of us.

Ways that church, commercials, exes, family narratives, etc have messed with your head or your idea of what you SHOULD be like. ⁠

But on the other side is something so sweet: You! Able to truly connect, able to be free, able to enjoy your life and body and marriage (or whatever!) in a way that actually honors how amazing you both are and how trustable your love is. So many of my clients are happily married, and then get even happier. Because they learn the tools they need to shed their protective shields that are up, and unlearn the conditioning of shame, guilt, and discomfort.

If you’re ready to feel better, reach out.



Intimacy is the missing ingredient in your leadership.

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