As women, we live in a world that isn’t always safe for us and this feeds into our beliefs about our desires. We feel we can’t let them out because it’s unsafe. Part of our journey in Uncover is detaching that from our desires and letting them exist separately. If we accept that we can embrace our desires and nothing bad would happen to us, that there is no “too much” or “too powerful”, then that safety piece in the world gets to be something else.
This is about not denying the fact we do live in that world. A world that we want to change and that we have a responsibility to change. It’s about decoupling that fact from our desires. We logically know that us wanting love and attention or wanting to succeed is not what makes the world unsafe. But the two have been narratively linked in our minds by society. We don’t feel we can be fully seen or visible. We can’t bring attention to ourselves. The thing is, that sense of unsafety is there regardless. Regardless of your desires. Regardless of you wanting more. That’s the world we live in. You didn’t create it by wanting to have a presence online, wanting to have a business, or wanting to have a partner. It exists outside of you.
When we can begin to extricate our desire from the world around us, we actually give ourselves permission to have all the things we want. We give ourselves permission to be the person we want to be. The leading role we want. And it’s not about bypassing or ignoring the fear. We just put it where it belongs. And us wanting to make the world better or different doesn’t mean we have to stay hidden and small. We can be as big as we want. We can have a part in changing it that doesn’t require us to stay safe. And we get to have the starring role in our own story.
I like to think of it like the roles Audrey Hepburn used to play, the classic role of the ingenue. In her movies, she was the star. There was always something about her character or her role as the main leading lady that so magnetic. So charming. She pulled the story along with her. That’s what we give ourselves permission to do. We become this exciting, mysterious character that people want to be around. They’re intrigued by our energy. They want to know more.
What would be like to go through life as the leading lady in your life?
By stepping into that role, we write ourselves this incredible permission slip that allows us to uncover more and more of what that magnet is that allows us to bring in more of what we want.